Chihuahua's – Want One

Nothing can replace face to face

Body language is a powerful thing. Some 2,000 years ago, the Roman philosopher Cicero noticed as much when he writes that "the actions of the body" express "the feelings and passions of the soul". "The entire context of a person and every look on his face and his voice are stated as the strings of a harp and sores, as they are struck by each successive emotion "He added.

Darwin then work on the expression of emotions in man and animals inspired by zoologists, anthropologists psychologists and a deeper understanding and body language to quantify how much communication is nonverbal.

We learn about people by what they wear, their accent, their gestures and facial expressions. When we meet people we agree with, we unconsciously develop a relationship and begin to mirror their body movements.

"People tend to breathe in relation to the same rate, adopt each other's expressions facial flashing at the same rate and use of the other, "said psychological illusionist Derren Brown in his book Tricks of the Mind.

This then stimulates relationship even further and makes us feel more comfortable with each other. In fact, reflecting the behavior of people when you meet them (subtly, of the mind) can help build this sense of relationship and create the feeling that you are someone they could do business with.

All this goes some way to show how important it is to meet people if you want to do business with them. In the days of Facebook, Twitter and LinkedIn, it is tempting to think that social networking can take the place of good old human contact – but they can not.

"Online networking has become more widespread in recent years, but there is only so much you can do online," said Charlie Lawson UK and Ireland National Director of BNI business networking group. "It's a good way to start relationships and to help all long after you've met people, but nothing beats the atmosphere of a live event.

"A Meeting BNI is like a party, "he added." It's a little tense at first but then it starts and the room was filled with animated chatter. Having body in a room allows people will ".

"People do business with people not with profiles," agrees Luke Cunliffe, Cunliffe Director of Associates, a training and development consultancy specializing in business networking. "The acid test to discover if you can do business with someone is really talk to them face to face. "

"The sole purpose of online networking, as far as I'm concerned, is to organize a meeting" says Matthew Pegler, founder and director of creative learning and development consultancy Altyerre and member of the Institute of Directors Forum filmmakers. "You can not sell something via email or LinkedIn."

Before you can do business with someone, you must understand that person, he explains, and you pick up a huge amount by seeing face to face – especially if you can see them in their own the environment, visiting their offices and living out it's like, what they wear and how they work.

"You have need to put yourself in their shoes, "says Matthew Pegler," and you can not do that on the phone. "

As an expert business networking and former CEO of Business Referral Exchange (BRX) Andy Lopata said, "I firmly believe that you really can learn to know someone and understand their business when you see the whites of the eyes. "

"People do business with people they love and confidence, "said Dave Clarke, CEO of NRG Group network. "You have to meet face to face and spend time with them to build that trust."

Referral business, too, work best when they are transmitted face to face.

Word-of-mouth recommendations are more important in firms with many online retail sites offer reviews of products available, but recent research by Mintel shows only 5% of respondents purchased a product based on the recommendation of a blogger or chat room. Partners, friends and parents are much more influential generating more than half of the recommendations that lead to the sale.

"We still prefer a personal recommendation from someone we know and trust, "said Chris Haack, senior analyst at Mintel. "Young adults are more likely to turn to the Internet for advice and referrals, but even they listen to their peers first. "

Referral networks of businesses, such as BNI and NRG, really. You meet people, who then meet people, and a network of personal contacts and trust the arbitrators accumulates.

"Make sure you invest enough time in meeting people," said Dave Clarke in his blog. "You can not engage in conversations enough staff to ensure that you build a trusted network of supporters. Your defenders will speak positively about you when you are there. "

Commercial lawyer David Glass is a big believer in the power of networking groups to generate business. He attends three or four meetings a week at different times of the day, and generated a lot of business through them. "I prefer mobile cocktails for dinner fixed seat, "he said," that they are more expensive and are productive if you happen to be sitting between good people. "

Face-to-face networking is also very valuable to the photographer Dianna Bonner. It is in the enviable position of being able to practice when she goes to events.

She took pictures at the meetings of event management network Launch London Ecademy networking group. "I'm networking and I am in the same time," she explains.

Not everyone is lucky enough to be able to demonstrate what they do at a networking meeting: some of us have to do with talking about it. But talking is crucial to engage people and build trust. If it is only possible to do business with someone when you have traveled a mile in their shoes, it is essential to know what these shoes look like.

About the Author

Cunliffe Associates offer an in house coaching service for executives, teams or one to one which includes effective networking, improving leadership and team communication.

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